Table Talk

Today is the day that we nationally remember Dr. Martin Luther King, Jr.  I have spent a good bit of this morning considering the significance of today; I have thought about the way things used to be, the way things are and the way things should be.  I have thought of Dr. King's courageous fight, his heroic death and the things he begged our nation to recognize.  I've come to the realization today that all of his convictions that he communicated through his poignant speeches were, in part, instructions for parents.  Doesn't it begin with us?

I have to commend my mother.  I always knew that if I said a bad word, that I'd spend a good bit of time without any trace of a social life, and I'd probably get myself a spanking I'd still to this day remember. But what I didn't know - what I never even allowed myself to wonder - was what would happen if I said the "N" word.  I still don't know. I still don't wonder.  It wasn't even in the same category as bad words.  See, saying a "bad" word might mean that we were full of anger, full of rebellion or full of our teenage, know-it-all selves. Saying the "N" word meant that we were full of hate, and that wasn't tolerated.  She taught us that before she taught us to walk. 

I'm 24 years old.  My mom can't chase me with a wooden spoon anymore, and she can't take away any special privileges, but the fear of punishment isn't why I believe what she taught me.  I believe what she taught me because it is inarguably and permanently true. What she taught me every single day of my life was that people are people.  Period.  She was careful about it; she knew that she couldn't exactly make it a non-issue and expect her children to learn from society what it means to respect others.  That'd be a reckless chance to take.  So we talked about it a good bit.  Learning to see people for their character rather than their color was a process that started at our breakfast table. Most lessons that really take root start there. 

So, having a family of my own now begs the question, "what will my children take away from our breakfast table?"  I hope that they will take away lessons of gratitude, selflessness, patience and respect.  I hope that they will learn to stand up for people who are being picked on and befriend people that are friendless.  I want them to be kind to people who aren't kind and to never define someone by the color of their skin.  I have to be the one to teach them things things, because if I don't, who will?  And if every parent was committed to teaching these lessons to their children, would our society finally transition from "the way things are" to "the way things should be?"

“The function of education, therefore, is to teach one to think intensively and to think critically. But education which stops with efficiency may prove the greatest menace to society. The most dangerous criminal may be the man gifted with reason, but with no morals.”